Mark Manson

I recommend Mark Manson – he's got a popular blog (https://markmanson.net) on topics like these and also wrote a great book, The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fuck.

Have you read the subtle art of not giving a fuck? - you are a perfect example of what happens when someone achieve their goal. They feel empty, with nothing to do. Sad And alone. https://markmanson.net/not-giving-a-fuck Now you need to find yourself a new purpose. Only you can find it, maybe that can help: figure out that plants are the top of the food chain, and the more we treat them well... the most fun we have around them! Explore the spiritual world, help others who haven't been as lucky as you, be hurt, and heal again, that's life man. *You could join me in a suicide/impossible mission to save the world, but i doubt you will - nobody is mad enough to follow me in this endeavour.

Congrats on the sobriety! Will be 5 years for me this May. I also found myself in a similar place as you in the months that followed quitting drinking: feeling a bit “now what?” and seeking some sort of guidance or structure for my life beyond the empty platitudes I saw in most self help content. And then at just the right time I came across these three blog posts which really helped create a personal roadmap of sorts. Sharing in the hope that they get you closer to what you’re seeking! 1. 7 Strange Questions That Help You Find Your Life Purpose https://markmanson.net/life-purpose 2. How to Grow Up and Be More Mature https://markmanson.net/how-to-grow-up 3. Personal Values: How to Know Who You Really Are https://markmanson.net/personal-values

https://markmanson.net/screw-finding-your-passion is a pretty good read about finding passion

This is the Opportunity Cost of entrepreneurship. You should read `No, You Can’t Have It All`[0] by Mark Manson. Sometimes you just have to forgo certain things to follow your dream [0] https://markmanson.net/you-cant-have-it-all

Mark Manson actually wrote a great article on this: In defense of being average => https://markmanson.net/being-average

I think it is a lot about values, see: https://markmanson.net/personal-values "For the last few years, I’ve had an idea for a satirical self-help article called, “The Productivity Secrets of Adolf Hitler.” The article would feature all the popular self-help tropes—goals, visualizations, morning routines—except expressed through the exploits of Hitler." Being productive for the sake of productivity is a fetish here, but not necessarily something fulfilling. Personally, I do feel the happiest when I am productive. But in my case, the easy part is to focus on things I consider worthwhile, the hard one - being productive. YMMV.

Recommended related: If Self-discipline Feels Difficult, Then You’re Doing It Wrong [1] by author of "The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck: A Counterintuitive Approach to Living a Good Life" 1. https://markmanson.net/self-discipline-youre-doing-it-wrong?utm_source… 2. https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/8529755.Mark_Manson

+1 for the Mark Manson reference. Loved this post in particular: https://markmanson.net/you-cant-have-it-all What I love is how explains the various tradeoffs and opportunity costs of having one thing, but not the other. His book the Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fuck is a must-read too: https://www.amazon.com/Subtle-Art-Not-Giving-Counterintuitive/dp/00624…

The best relationship advice guide is here in my opinion: https://markmanson.net/relationship-advice If not for the tactical advice inside of the article, it's a launching pad for other resources to dive into (such as the 5 language of love).

> I'm very outgoing, but I have love shyness or something like that. I basically don't date. I find the entire thing extremely stressful and unbearable. I've always been alone. I can relate to this a lot. If I may make a recommendation - despite the awful name, Models[0] by Mark Manson[1] did a lot to re-frame my interaction with women I'm romantically interested in. It takes the refreshing approach that rather than learning tricks or lines like other male-oriented dating books this one comes from a place of honesty and vulnerability. He has a blog [2] if you want a taste of his writing. [0] https://www.amazon.com/Models-Attract-Women-Through-Honesty-ebook/dp/B… [1] Better known for his book 'The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck' [2] https://markmanson.net/archive

This is profound. Mark Manson [0] writes about how long-term happiness/tranquility can only be found in saying "No" in our world of infinite choice - in intentionally limiting ourselves and actively choosing to focus on depth rather than breadth in our relationships, careers, travels, etc. [0] https://markmanson.net/

> Has anyone had any luck finding a way to put perspective on it, or figure out a lie that helps keep you going? Don't lie to yourself, it's no good trying to build some delusional version of the world, your subconscious mind knows how to look through the cracks of the mirror and the dead weight will rear its head at some point and pull down at the worst possible moment. Getting some perspective is about learning to take a step back and contemplate (practicing mindfulness and meditation may help in strengthening the matching neural pathways). Yet keep in mind that it does not mean being indifferent[0]. Pick your fights, choose to act upon what you can and desire to[1]. Find balance. [0]: (Warning: copious profanity) https://markmanson.net/not-giving-a-fuck [1]: https://i1.wp.com/thebestintent.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/01/ikigai_…

Looks quite worthwhile, thanks! Found this discussing him: https://markmanson.net/ken-wilber ("The rise and fall of...")

I am at work, but I don't give a fuck. This is the best thing I've read for a long time: "Because when we give too many fucks, when we choose to give a fuck about everything, then we feel as though we are perpetually entitled to feel comfortable and happy at all times, that’s when life fucks us."[1] 1. https://markmanson.net/not-giving-a-fuck

- Life advice type stuff: Mark Manson (https://www.markmanson.net), Alain de Botton (https://www.youtube.com/user/schooloflifechannel) - Photography/Film making: Philip Bloom (http://www.philipbloom.net/) - Tech: DHH/Jason Fried/Basecamp (https://m.signalvnoise.com/)

In Mark Manson's new book[0] he talks about how humans can excel at very few things, often barely one, and that "being a good person" for lack of a better phrase counts as one. It seems obvious in hindsight, but struck me because I hadn't thought of it that way before. (The book is incredible, by the way. I've already read it twice, just like Derek Sivers. Recommend it highly.) [0]: https://markmanson.net/books/subtle-art

Mark Manson put out a great explanation why people go to such extremes, he called them a "fake-alpha". [1] It happens when going from a "nice guy" with repressed anger and unmet needs to a so called "alpha-male" popularized by the modern pick-up communities. While the short-term it might be working, it doesn't actually make you a better person to live with. This can changed be with opening up more. [2] [1] http://postmasculine.com/the-fake-alpha-males/comment-page-1 [2] http://markmanson.net/power-in-vulnerability

This is so important. I also believe that this is the central conflict between the disenfranchised and the entitled. Yes, we despise evil, but we do nothing but help create it by turning on those we perceive as bad people the second we're given the go ahead. "I can do better as a human being with empathy towards someone who is broken; sad and probably doesn't understand why people hate him." If we ever want to stop hatred, if we ever want to stop violence, if we ever want to fundamentally stop the same alienated people who turn to mass violence as their destructive outlets, we have to do it with empathy. This article is great, and I post it every time the gun control argument comes up after every mass shooting that comes up: http://markmanson.net/school-shootings Empathy is the only thing that will save us. It might not save us all, but we have to try.

Best short essay I know on this subject: http://markmanson.net/procrastination

It's not the original blog, it is just a repost from here http://markmanson.net/

Journaling is actually a great way of promoting mental and emotional health. I don't journal daily because I don't have enough to say every day, but I do something similar called "writing therapy", especially when I'm feeling emotionally stuck. I find bad emotions to only be bothersome because they are inside and unprocessed. Externalizing emotions onto a physical page (not digital!) helps me process them. The physical act of subsequently crumpling the piece of paper and throwing it out is catharsis. The act itself somehow tells my brain not to hold on to certain feelings -- I've done the work to process them and I can now let them go. I do this when I'm experiencing minor issues that don't rise to the level of needing to talk to a $150/hr therapist. Some people prefer talking things out, but I prefer writing. "So what do therapy, journaling, and meditation all have in common? All three are techniques to help us convert what is usually the subject of our consciousness into the object of our consciousness. That’s it." [1] [1] https://markmanson.net/how-to-get-better

I agree with a lot of what you said and think you did a good job saying it! > Every night I've watched thousands of unarmed peaceful protestors march by, demanding action. Meanwhile the NYPD is out in full military gear firing chemical weapons and rubber bullets indiscriminately at anyone who looks at them the wrong way. I was forwarded an interesting newsletter today from Mark Manson. He talks about holding contradictory ideas in our minds and how uncomfortable that can make us. How much easier is can be to fall back on confirmation bias and fallacies of composition/division. It’s much easier to think of the protestors as all peaceful and the cops as indiscriminate thugs than to wrestle with the messy middle of some rioting looters causing mayhem and mostly peace loving officers trying to deescalate. I recommend reading it and I found it thoughtful and basically apolitical until the left learning ending. https://markmanson.net/newsletters/mindfck-monday-33

If we replace the word "asshole" with "criminals", few except a couple of hardline conservatives would assume that one's destiny in life is being a criminal from the day you are born. Instead, as far as I understand most research, lots of external factors play a major role here. That probably is exactly the same here. These men have been socially conditioned to be assholes. Which, in my eyes, means that there actually should be room for some empathy. Which doesn't mean excusing their behavior, but it means understanding that despite their power and money, they are like every other human being the product of their environment and culture. And this culture is a joint product of every single member of it. Mark Manson wrote an insightful essay about this, titled "What's the problem with men". Tl;dr: "We unfairly objectify women in society for their beauty and sex appeal. Similarly, we unfairly objectify men for their professional success and aggression." https://markmanson.net/whats-the-problem-with-men

Mark Manson's Articles: https://markmanson.net/

Here's a good explanation of why blockchain is the future with real world utility: https://markmanson.net/newsletters/mindfck-monthly-97

It's important to learn to be ok with our own limitations, our proximity to the average. I like Mark Manson's writing on the subject, e.g. https://markmanson.net/being-average or his book "The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck"

https://markmanson.net/the-fear-of-the-unknown Not everyone likes Mark, but if you’re curious, he explains the psychological situation better, at least, than I can.

This is the same line of thought Mark Manson (Subtle art of not giving a Fuck). He says seeking happiness is a bad idea and the same that telling kids you can be whatever you want is damaging just as you said. He says things that I feel like we know most of the times but just don't want to admit. This[1][2] is what he has to say about depression. It's largely about acceptance. [1]: https://markmanson.net/youre-okay [2]: https://markmanson.net/the-uncomfortable-truth

Just gonna leave this here -- https://markmanson.net/attention